Drama Llama

I'm really not sure what I want to say here.  I have been thinking on/stewing on some things for a few days and I still have no idea what I want to say specifically.  I don't want to sound dramatic either, though I'm sure some think that of me no matter what, so bear with me.


With a new baby on the way I have been cleaning house.  Purging lots of things that we don't need.  Donating things that are just taking up space and we have no use for anymore.  It feels so good when I drop off a load of things to Goodwill or other such donation sites.  I have also been trying to get a bit more organized.  Call it summer cleaning/nesting or whatever, it is feeling good.  


I have also been trying to minimize my stress.  We have more than our fair share here with little kids, babies coming back to back, new cars to buy, old houses to try and unload, church callings, work related issues, cats...I know so many of you can relate.  There are stresses that I can't avoid and are necessary.  I am doing my best to embrace and accept those stresses and learn and grow with them.  And at the same time I am coming to realize that there are many stresses that I don't have to have in my life at all.  That I am allowing them a level of importance out of fear.  Fear of hurting other people's feelings because I tend to be blunt.  Fear of how it will look to other people if I were to just say enough and cut the crap. 


A few nights ago while I was folding clothing I was stewing about something I had to deal with on Facebook.  I was irritated that it should even be an issue and this particular person was someone I didn't much care for anyway.  So why on EARTH was I still friends with this person??  Why was the thought of "unfriending" someone, whose very name showing up on my page makes me irritated, making me feel guilty?  It's MY PAGE right??  I don't have to have ANYONE as a friend that I don't want, right?   


I love Facebook.  I very much do.  I feel connected to other people during the day.  All you wonderful people that I miss so much from "home" I can "see" and chat with and keep up with.  I have developed wonderful friendships with people that I otherwise would not have been able to connect with and I am beyond thankful for that.  I have been able to get to know new friends here in NE better than I ever could have with out FB.  I love reading little bits of your family and children's struggles and funnies.  I love seeing my nieces and nephews grow and the silly things they say and do! I love chatting with siblings, parents and cousins. I love that so many of you share not only the good and happy things, but the hard, sad, and frustrating things as well.  It is good to feel connected to others, to know that I am not a lone in my struggles, and hear what worked for you and why.  I am so thankful that we have this technology that keeps me in touch with so many of you wonderful people. 


That said, I won't be posting as much for the next little bit while I get my friends list under control.  I will still be on and probably comment on all your stuff (because I need that connection) but there are some people in my life right now that seem to have a problem with my posting anything that isn't rainbows, glitter and sunshine.  Not only do they have a problem with it, they feel the need to bug me and others about it.  So instead of second guessing EVERYTHING I post, wondering if people will understand and see the humor like I do, wondering if I really am just a dramatic crazy and if am raising a houseful of dramatic crazies, and wondering if we will be getting texts and phone calls about my poor, emotionally difficult and sensitive self...well, I will just cut back on everything until I feel that my friends list is a "safe" place again.  


I am done keeping certain people on my "friends" list because I "should" or because it "looks right."  I have decided that my Facebook friends should be people that I enjoy.  Why on EARTH am I friends with people that I have to hide from my page (and there are more than a few of these people!!)?  I shouldn't even NEED to use a Restricted List.  If you need to be restricted then you shouldn't be my friend.  Period.  I was shocked by how many people I have had to "hide" from my wall and who I have on restricted access because their lifestyles and mine just don't jive AT ALL.  Maybe it sounds harsh.  Maybe it is but like all the useless stuff in my house all these people who add nothing but stress that I don't need are going too. At least on my facebook page!  


So I am taking back my Facebook.  It should be about my preferences and I am going to make it about me! Selfish I know, but as many other parent's know it isn't often that we can be selfish and have it be "okay." I should have somewhere that I can share good and bad things with people who are going through the same things without having to worry about how things "look" to everyone else.  I should be surrounding myself with support, fun, and understanding.  I should be surrounding myself with people who can agree to disagree and we can ENJOY the disagreeing because we are intelligent adults who enjoy hearing both sides.  I should have a bunch of friends.  


I know that I am very close to having a baby too and I didn't want my lack of sharing on FB to worry anyone.  Brady and I have many wonderful family members and friends who we share much with on FB (well me more than him lol) and I don't want anyone to worry about us on that front.  


So here I go!  Time to purge!

Pictures...

The girls like to flop around and play on the bed in Beckah's room after she wakes up from nap time.  It's super fun and usually I join them but I decided to take some picture instead.

Daddy kisses! 

Even our nutter of a cat (Rockstar) will try and get in on the fun from time to time.  He gets kicked off the bed pretty quick though since he thinks teeth and claws are appropriate at play time and the girls don't agree. 

I love how Beckah will just flop down on pillows and blankets!  Then she lets out this sill belly laugh that makes her sound like a lunatic.  It's awesome.  

Oh I have an idea!!  Lets take a picture of all three of them...still in their PJs and with crazy hair!  Yeah!  

Okay...not so much but they did sit together so I'll take it.  

Yesterday we had a sunny day for the first time in a week.  It's been raining a lot, which we are grateful for but I have to admit that it was so very nice to see the sun.  So Cadence and Rory let me take some pictures of them in the pretty evening sunlight.  

I really just love how much they love each other.  It's like pulling teeth to get them to take pictures separate.  

This next one is the same as the one above but it is right out of the camera so you can see how rosy the light was as the sun set.  

Jumping!!!

Wiggle those hips!

No no...for real this time!

 

I just love these girls.  

Hope you are all having a wonderful March!

Oh Siblings...

We sent the girls to bed. About 20 minutes later I hear the following conversation through the door:

Rory: Cady. Cady. Cady. Cady. Caaaaady. Cady. Cady. Cady. Cady. Cady? Cady. Cady. Cadence. Cady. Cady Cady. Ca-

Cadence: WHAT?!?!

Rory: Whatcha doing?

Cadence: Trying to SLEEP.

Rory: Oh.

((Long pause))

Rory: Cady?

Cadence: Ugg! What!!

Rory: Goodnight.

Cadence: (sigh) Goodnight Rory.

Cadence's 6 year stats

Cadence had her 6 year well check this morning! She was 50lbs (75th percent) and 4 feet 1 inch tall (95th percent). :o) Her eye sight was perfect and she is (as usual) above all her "milestones." The Dr was very impressed with her over all heath and told her that she was the ideal patient and to keep up the good work! :o)

Beckah's 1 year stats!

Dr says she is looking good, though her height dropped off a bit in the last couple of months.  She probably is between growth spurts was our guess since she is right on target in every other way.  She was a hair shy of 20lbs and 30 inches with a 18 inch noggin. :o)  She is holding true to her curve and is my "middle of the road" kid!  :o)  

Hope March is treating everyone well!   

Beckah's Birthday Cake!

 We didn't have a big party for Beckah's 1st birthday.  Just some cake for the birthday girl!

My super awesome decorating job!  I know you are all amazed at my wicked skills. 

We sang and let her get started.  She was sure what to do at first.  We had to put some frosting in her mouth so she would know it was yummy. 

It wasn't long before she was stuffing it into her mouth like there was a time limit. 

Then we started to have a problem.  She had so much frosting on her hands that she couldn't "un-stick" them from themselves.  She doesn't like this.

So she tries to use frosting glued fingers to just pick up the whole cake.  I'm not sure if she was going to try and eat the whole thing, or just dump it on the floor.  My bet is the floor.

In the end she started fussing to have her hands cleaned.  :o)  lol

It was a fun night for us! The big girls got to decorate their own cup cake to eat (Rory just ate the frosting lol) and Beckah went to bed shortly after getting a bath.  Brady and I had some left over cake! 

Happy 1st Birthday Beckah!!

One year ago today I had the sweetest little girl.  Her birth was so easy.  I was laughing between pushes. 

She was darling.  Looked like her big sister Cadence and was so peaceful.  She was born, looked around, and then took a 5 hour nap.  lol 

Her sister's were so excited about her.  The fought over who could hold her and watch her sleep.  They couldn't wait until she was big enough to play.  

She got big way to fast. 

Watching her personality peek out was fun for me.  I was doing my best to soak up every last thing with her.  I felt like she was a gift just for me. 

And she kept growing much to fast!

 

And now she is one.

I cried a bit this morning when I woke up.  We aren't having a big family party like we have in the past.  I'm not really sad about that.  I think a quiet little party after dinner tonight will be just perfect. 

No. I cried because I feel like I'm going to miss out on so much important stuff with her because she has a brother coming in a few months.  There is so much to do in preparation for another baby and sometimes I am angry at having to worry about all of that because I still have a baby.  Then today I was reminded that she is growing up.  She won't be a baby much longer, but a big eyed little girl who will be more interested in what her sisters are up to than me.  I'm going to miss my last little baby girl.  

I am looking forward to watching her grow.  Watching her try her hardest to keep up with the big girls and seeing what her relationship with her brother will be like.  I am looking forward to more of her laughs, kisses and hugs. 

Happy Birthday Beckah!  We love you so!